With Time Comes Guilt

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“Back in 9th grade, I was enrolled at this school by the name of ‘Al-Yasir Academy’. There were some other schools in the locality too with whom it always led to an inevitable rivalry. Fast forward to my 9th grade board exams, all of us were preparing for the exam; amidst our preparation, our school’s Sir who I won’t name, may Allah grant him Jannah, leaked the question paper to us along with the solutions. He did this so our school’s reputation would increase. I went along with this little scheme and did good on my exam, got a B overall, and the schools reputation increased because everyone seemed to ace the exam. It felt good in the beginning, I finally had something to show for but Ill be honest, with time came guilt. I had learned nothing, It started feeling lousy because it wasn’t my working. Whenever I told someone about my grades, there was always something inside of me telling me that I could never actually amount to that much. So when I got solved questions papers for my metric exam, I didn’t bat an eye to it. I decided, I’ll either pass or fail but at least I’ll have the satisfaction of knowing that I did it on my own. I got a C. I can tell you one thing for sure, that was the highlight of my year. I couldn’t control the happiness that I felt. My efforts had finally paid off. I finally amounted to at least something.”

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One thought on “With Time Comes Guilt

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